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happy2Bjustmommy Blockhead Sister

Joined: 24 Jun 2006 Posts: 8706 Location: Queen Creek, AZ HC$ 52.60
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Posted: Tue Jul 20, 2010 12:33 pm Post subject: Noah Michael |
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Today i learned that my baby was a boy. we have decidced to name him Noah Michael. I feel differently than i thought i would, after finding out this info. I cant describe how i feel.
I also learned that he had a strange Genetic Y chromosome issue. They recomeneded that my husband get his chromosomes checked. He already had Karyotyping, and this didnt show up. So now i dont know what to think. I was told that this chromosome issue, alone, would not have caused his death, but he would not have been "normal". However. i wonder if it did in fact cause his death. He is my 4th boy, to die, without cause , in the second trimester. I really think this has something to do with it.
I am in such a bad place. I cannot describe how lonely I feel. I am getting just about no support, and my life is expected to just go on. I am hurting, physically hurting, every day. My heart is aching, my arms are aching. I just sit and have blank stares. I am in shock that this happened to me again.
I have enormous pressure to just be normal, to attend church, to hang out with friends, to be super mom. All i want to do is crawl in a hole. My baby is dead, and the world doesnt care.
Every time i see a pregnant woman, read about a pregnancy, a birth announcement, a gender announcement, or even issues involving pregnancy, or the baby, i feel sad. I didnt care what my baby was, or what issues he would have had. I would have loved and cared for him. No matter what, and felt blessed that he was given to me. I dont know what i have dont to deserve this.
To my sweet Noah,
I am so so sorry that something caused you to die. I am sorry my body failed to give you the life you deserve. I am sorry i didnt get to birth you, and give you the entry the outside world that you deserved. I am sorry i didnt get to hold you, to tell you how much i love you, and how much i miss you.
I think about you every single minute. My heart aches, and longs to be with you. The rest of my life seems too long.
I wish you could have stayed with me. I love you. _________________ Melissa Mom with 11 kiddos. 4 who run on Earth, 7 who soar with the angels.
Foster mom to 2
My 9 year old is shaving her head for charity!
http://www.stbaldricks.org/participants/GabbyA |
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Momto3Thatsme Super sweet(s)

Joined: 01 May 2007 Posts: 3731 Location: SC HC$ 52.18
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Posted: Tue Jul 20, 2010 12:45 pm Post subject: |
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I'm so sorry Melissa, Please know that I continue to think of you and Noah!
 _________________ Maureen
Former Owner of SHLS, and Mom to Joshua (19), Emma (14), & Rebecca (8)
Last edited by Momto3Thatsme on Tue Jul 20, 2010 12:47 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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Umm_Abbaad Janet

Joined: 08 Jan 2006 Posts: 14036 Location: ISO a seat belt for this darn wagon - I keep falling off HC$ 181.65
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Posted: Tue Jul 20, 2010 12:46 pm Post subject: |
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I'm so sorry Melissa, I can't even imagine the pain  _________________ Janet aka Ama
mama to my little man Abbaad 7-7-08 , a little lady Ayah 11-3-10 and another boy due 3-24-13
Ama'z Padz
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Earn while you search with SwagBucks |
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Babycakies Wants to spin nakid
Joined: 12 Jul 2008 Posts: 5779 Location: Somewhere North of Crazy and South of Sane HC$ 62.72
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Posted: Tue Jul 20, 2010 1:31 pm Post subject: |
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*crying*
Wishing you some love and comfort on this journey.
Blessings for Baby Noah who earned his wings far too soon! _________________ ~Melanie
- WAHM to Peanut(Dec 03), Bean(May 05) and Sprout (Apr 07).
EweWearEmS
Closed - All booked up! |
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kbrown99 just need challenges to make me creative

Joined: 29 Jun 2008 Posts: 7840 Location: Tennessee HC$ 261.61
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Posted: Tue Jul 20, 2010 2:09 pm Post subject: |
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I don't have any words. Just tons of hugs and prayers.
 _________________ Kristina, wife to Ben, homeschooling, SAHM to 5 beautiful kids.
I love to , , most kitchen crafts, and trade.
Ravelry Project Page
Brown Sugar Sweets is still available for trades and purchases. Just PM, email, or go to the BSS FB page |
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alivals aka "mom's too lazy to cook"

Joined: 28 Apr 2006 Posts: 3986 Location: Waiting on the pp fairy... HC$ 220.35
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Posted: Tue Jul 20, 2010 3:06 pm Post subject: |
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 _________________ Alicia
Married to Michael
Mama to Joe, Kiki, Mickey, and Christian
~Will knit for yarn/ trades |
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toadallyscrumptious Maxed out Hyena

Joined: 04 Oct 2006 Posts: 5852 Location: Georgia HC$ 94.71
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Posted: Tue Jul 20, 2010 3:12 pm Post subject: |
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I'm so sorry Melissa.  _________________ Di Linh - mom to Gavin (8), Evelyn (6), Everett (b 12/01/09), Charm (14), Bunnicula (2), Rosa (2)
Toadally Scrumptious
Toadally Scrumptious feedback |
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littleknittles Maxed out Hyena

Joined: 17 Aug 2009 Posts: 5279
HC$ 63.54
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Posted: Tue Jul 20, 2010 3:26 pm Post subject: |
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i'm so sorry. _________________ Michele
currently on hiatus from...fun. |
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Seun Designs Inc. bought a dress with magical powers

Joined: 14 Nov 2007 Posts: 5451 Location: Ontario, Canada HC$ 28.42
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Darcykins Oh, just buy it already!

Joined: 24 Apr 2009 Posts: 2574 Location: Nowhere anyone wants to be HC$ 61.38
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Posted: Tue Jul 20, 2010 5:36 pm Post subject: |
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Im sorry your in so much pain, its just so not fair for any mother to loose her baby. Im also sorry you have the added stress of an underlying health issue, more to add to your plate. _________________ Darcykins
Spoiled Wife to Douglas
Mommy to M,J,N,N,J,&E
Missing Baby Donald every day.
Enjoying our new addition Lil Zoe! 12/18/09! |
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whidbeymom needs handle brakes
Joined: 04 Jan 2007 Posts: 3325
HC$ 782.09
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Posted: Tue Jul 20, 2010 5:36 pm Post subject: |
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I've been thinking about you lately and praying that you find the peace and support you need through this time. _________________ Kelly Mom to JM (10-6-02), JR (1-25-05), JT (11-9-06), DR (11-25-09) |
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Moonstone Has serious cabin fever

Joined: 12 Aug 2009 Posts: 1870 Location: Jack Frost's Armpit HC$ 85.89
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Posted: Tue Jul 20, 2010 7:42 pm Post subject: |
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I am so incredibly sorry. I wish that there was something I could do to help ease your pain but please know that your baby boy has left a mark on so many lives here on HC and we all honor him.
Lots of love to you  _________________ Genevieve (no, not the talented one), married to Shane, mama to Miss Mouse and Little G! |
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nebwhit **dreams of making something beautiful**

Joined: 07 Apr 2006 Posts: 4123 Location: Sunny Florida HC$ 62.70
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Posted: Tue Jul 20, 2010 8:15 pm Post subject: |
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Hugs Melissa. _________________ Smiles
Jennifer -- Mommy to three |
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crystalanne79 Beautiful mama; amazing cloth pads

Joined: 14 Jul 2008 Posts: 7001 Location: Canada HC$ 89.06
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Posted: Tue Jul 20, 2010 8:19 pm Post subject: |
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I'm so sorry.  _________________ Crystal WAHM to Emma & Liam, loving wife to Scott.
Tree Hugger Mama Cloth
Specializing in Luxury- Minkee and Organic Bamboo Velour Mama Cloth.
Earn free Amazon gift cards easily - Swagbucks |
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jodi_snider Giver of Encouraging Words

Joined: 06 Jun 2006 Posts: 6955 Location: portland, or HC$ 137.16
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Posted: Tue Jul 20, 2010 9:31 pm Post subject: |
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i'm so sorry you never got to hold your sweet noah. (((hug))) _________________ jodi addicted to
married to jason 07.31.99
mama to kellen 05.20.05, ainsley 05.03.08 and bowen 12.28.10 |
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